Why Men Invented Sleeping Pills and…

…Why I Should Eat a Handful Quite Regularly…

I woke up at four a.m. this morning and thought, “Hmmm, if I’m not sleepy why not have some fun?”

Giving my peacefully sleeping partner a rare break, I slipped out of bed and decided fun in this instance was planning the menu for a dinner party/game night/sleepover shindig I’m having this weekend.  Absorbingly engrossing as menus and grocery lists are; my mind wandered to the comments flying back and forth on my Amazon page over the last couple days.  A Date with Fate recently received a two -star and then one-star review. Both reviews promoted some lively, unexpected discussions in the comments section due to the POV’s of three reviewers.

One of the results of this flurry was to make me think about the words used to describe books, what the terms mean to different people, and why they are necessary as guideposts for story choices for some readers.

Take the word TRILOGY, for example.

It was vexing me to contemplate I may be forced to write one of these triangular tales against my weak will. I don’t much like the word trilogy from an aesthetic viewpoint, nor do I much like odd numbers; they’re bullies. Odd numbers remind me of two women sharing a “WTF?” look over what the third is saying, even thought the third can plainly see the two doing this and thinks, “Well, that wasn’t very nice!” The third then texts their fourth, who couldn’t be there, that the two “WTFer’s” are acting like a couple of mean B’s. It is never a win/win with the odd numbers.  Nor do I like the inferred concept in trilogies of beginning-middle-end. The books too often reflect this sequential formula in the contents of what is written. They came, and they napped, and they left.

I like the even numbers—they’re exciting and energetic!  “Hello, what do you say the two of us get together for dinner and you can buy breakfast?” or “Hey, the four of us should go downtown and cause some trouble!” or “Let’s round up sixty people and rent a castle with dungeons to play Hide ‘n  Seek in the dark for a week!”

The one bad thing about even numbers is poor, pitiful number eight. I could strangle “OctopussyMom” and “Ass and Kate plus 8”, or going wayyy back, “My God, Eight is Enough, all ready!” for ruining a perfectly good even number. I also decided, as I looked over my herbs and spices on hand for cooking, I enjoy parallel lines and rectangles, or the best yet, the beautiful SQUARE.

Remember the game Four Square? The game Four Square has to be the best playground game ever invented on the planet. (Other than the game I invented from necessity when obsessed with playing Four Square. My game was played behind the building at the park where we played Four Square. It required some finesse. The object was to get the malingering boys off their butts and in line to play. It went something like, Tracy says, “You show me yours now, and if you can beat me at Four Square, that girl over there will show you hers later.” The Malingerer, being a natural show-off, promptly agrees. The finesse part was making sure I didn’t lose, or that I could run faster than any Malingerer or Girls Over There.)  It’s always a win/win with the even numbers.

So, that was one E-normous problem resolved in my life by 4:04 AM on the microwave clock this happy day in November. I am left with no logical choice but to ditch the Trilogy of Terror idea and make “The Adventures of Anabel Axelrod” an ongoing two, four, or sixty-volume saga.

The HEA part is going to be a more difficult problem. I’ll have to ponder longer over a café au lait. Unless, (a snap of the fingers), I change the very root meaning of the acronym!  Happily-Ever-After is now to be officially known as Happily-Enjoying-Anabel.

“Hmmm, I wonder if that is considered pulling a fast one…”

 I might have to take that idea behind the castle for some finessing.

A Date with Fate is a FREE download this weekend!

A Date with Fate (The Adventures of Anabel Axelrod) eBook/kindle version will be offered for a FREE download on amazon.com this weekend on Saturday 11/24/12 and Sunday 11/25/12.

Check it out and tell your friends.

This is in appreciation (pity party) for all the lovely (insane) people out there I relate to…The people happily cooking (slaving) away for families and friends by putting on a great (dammit) Thanksgiving Day and a fabulous (expensive) dinner. For those of us smiling (grinning maniacally) and enjoying (tolerating) the relatives little (monstrous) quirks and foibles (freakishness) because we love them (yes, indeed) and this needs to be thought of (chanted) regularly as a reminder (brainwashing) of our blessings (accursedness) throughout the holidays (time of torment).

May I suggest carving (not literally) out some time for you (yes, you)? Perhaps pour yourself a glass of your favorite beverage, (vodka-tall glass), or maybe a warm cup of your favorite bean, (Irish coffee-tall cup), sit down and relax, (horizontally-in bed), and read my book for free? (If you can’t think of anything better to do while doing all of the above.)

If you do read my book (it will make you laugh) and have an opportunity (hear the knock?), please post a quick (two page) review on Amazon, Goodreads, or here on my blog (as a last resort).

Happy Thanksgiving (seriously), Americans (proud to be)!  Let the good times roll (that’s a given)!

Tracy

Hello Out There!

I know the names of ten incredibly lucky people in regards to my goodreads.com Book Giveaway…but I’m not tellin’!

 

Uh-huh. That’s right.

*Ten humans have been chosen to receive a signed

copy of A Date with Fate (The Adventures of Anabel Axelrod) delivered to their mailboxes sometime within the next…

Forty thousand three hundred and twenty minutes.

 

*I admit this is an assumption on my part and goodreads.com is in no way responsible for me believing the winners of my Giveaway are human, or indeed, even from Earth. This is a book geared towards romantic fantasy versus Sci-fi/Fantasy, so I just figured it was a safe bet. Although, now that you’ve brought it up, I suppose it’s probable there would be some ding-dong aliens out there that don’t understand english. They might get their genres mixed-up and entered my Giveaway in error. In which event, I have made an ass out of you and me, but more me than you, by assuming all readers are english speaking humans and/or all aliens are superior beings that don’t make very human mistakes. I apologize for thinking and shan’t make a habit of it.

So, now that we’ve cleared that issue up, please check my blog for news of future book events and, as always, I wish everyone in the Universe…

Happy Reading!

Tracy Ellen

p.s. If you read this post, please don’t be too frightened to read my book. It’s not my fault what I write.

p.s.s. Should you be an alien winner of my book and feel like I, in some small way, talked smack about aliens; please do not shake my house and remove me from my peaceful bed to perform an anal probe. I am totally not up for that, especially not after the day I had today, and would have to retaliate. That’s how wars start, in case you were wondering.

p.s.s.s. The books were mailed out on Saturday 11/17/12–so be on the lookout for delivery via slow boat from China book rate within seven-ten thousand business days. Thanks again for participating!